You cut me open…

We watched the movie Sometime in April in class on Friday night. We've moved on from the DR Congo to Rwanda in our tour of African heartbreak funded by the West. And in this case, more of just the West standing by and doing nothing. Good movie.

The next morning I got up and went on a Girls Weekend road trip to Cederberg. Which was beautiful. And amazing.

 

 

 

But.

 

 

 

 

…yeah

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I think the hardest part of South Africa isn't learning about the hard stuff, or crying your eyes out, or hearing the stories about people you know. It's the going back, it's the trying to pretend that everything is normal and carefree. I guess you could say that vacationing is the hardest part for me. It's the not having people to talk my thoughts out to. 800,000 people died in 100 days in 1994. And those killers? Most of them ran away to Congo to avoid charges, where they're still raping and murdering today. Thrilling news.

And no, I haven't had a boyfriend in a year, and yes, its been over a year and a half since my only really serious boyfriend and I broke up. No, I don't really care about all your relationships. Yes, I am horrible at these games. (yes I am self-conscious about a lot of these things) Yes, I do love late night gossip sessions. I do love giggling and being silly. Yes I love chocolate and red wine and bread and pasta. Yes I love getting to know people better. Yes I did have a really good time this weekend. No, I don't feel like myself right now.

My only problem is

… I keep keep bleeding/breathing (depending on which version you choose. :p)

 

Usually being around Beauty and being in vast unexplored open spaces heals my soul. Usually I don't feel down and out of it the day after I get back.